Posts Tagged ‘expectations’

what is it about lines?

Thursday, May 29th, 2008

We have them everywhere, lines in geometry are good; a straight line is a quick way to get some place; we park between them usually; fishing line is important if you want to catch a fish; we say to color in between the lines but when it comes to waiting in line, ugh.

Have you been in the express line at the grocery store and someone walks up with more than 20 items? I’m not sure what is worse that or having someone in a “regular” line question the amount they were charged for a roll of paper towels that might save them 10 cents. The post office can be a bad place to be when you’ve been in line for awhile and one of the two cashiers goes on break. How about a line at the courthouse for a car registration that snakes around the middle of the room? I was there not so long ago and decided to people watch for about 30 minutes. People talk about the weirdest things in line…

As usual someone eventually gets upset in these situations and then look around for someone to be on their side or try to verbally justify their emotion. Maybe I’m too laid back but I don’t get it. Life is scheduled down to the second and we always have people to see and places to go. However, the object of our ”wrath” often has little to do with the circumstance (unless you are waiting in a fast food drive through line and they get your order wrong, right?).  

Try to smile and leave those servants surprised. Make their day with a kind word and a smooth transaction. I don’t foresee us ever getting rid of lines at least not the kind you wait in…

Marriage bill of rights

Tuesday, April 22nd, 2008

MSN had two articles posted as The Husband’s Bill of Rights, http://men.msn.com/article.aspx?cp-documentid=6742052&GT1=32001, and the Wife’s Bill of Rights, http://men.msn.com/article.aspx?cp-documentid=6750191. Interesting and humorous, they definitely could help with some expectations but what does it say about our concept of marriage?

Think about it, such a “bill” is written to preserve individuality. Can a marriage survive that way? If you have to write them out will they be truly respected? Aren’t some of those rights given up to a degree when we choose marriage over being single? How about focusing on someone else besides yourself and your happiness? Maybe in marriage we end up running from what is revealed about us when we try to merge 2 lives together. As humans there is selfishness and sin and that gets messy which doesn’t qualify as happily ever after.

Marriage opens up doors for personal growth that remain closed if we don’t mature. For example, the areas of  communication and compromise. Some studies show that married couples spend less than 10 minutes in conversation a week. One must learn to appreciate their spouse for who they are. Secondly, we all need to be loved and we need to find ways to show love; marriage is the perfect environment.   Also, in a marriage we are often the beneficiaries of forgiveness and grace and we should show it even more often to our spouses, too.

I’m afraid any time we assert our rights, rebellion in some form is to follow. I believe we need to have a higher view of marriage. A view that leads us to consider a bigger purpose that maybe, just maybe, marriage is more than an experience you should try in your lifetime.  Marriage is about two becoming one, a mystery that is given life, hope and purpose in God’s plan. It is that spiritual dynamic that gives traction to a relationship and as a result it nearly eliminates the need for “rights.”